New Beginnings

New beginnings, a fresh start, a clean plate, the new "you"- there are many ways to state a new stage in your life. People have high hopes in the beginning of the year to become a better person, to lose weight or to exercise more, to end a harmful habit and to pick up a more beneficial habit instead. Many of these things I hope for myself! I have plans to be a better person and to not buy into consumerism or live for others. This, however is more easier said than done. (I will keep you updated). I also would like to blog more… a little confused as to why because I don't really think I have too many people jumping up and down to catch a glimpse of my blog, but hey- I can dream big! 

Today marked the start of new classes, actually my last semester as an undergraduate! A really weird feeling. As I walked to my first class, I thought of when my parents left me at college in between the thoughts of me not getting my desired seat. To my luck and quick pace, I made it to my seat- the one I wanted. I also continued my thoughts of my first year at college. It was the weirdest feeling to see them walk away and know that I was away from them! I remember where I saw them last, what I was wearing, and looking back a second too late to notice that they were out of my view. It was scary, I was all by myself now. My family would be going back to Asheville and I would be staying in the Piedmont area in High Point, NC. I managed, and went through a lot that year. I grew up, I become a woman. I dealt with things that happened in my past, I grieved, I laughed, I thought, I cried, I learned about the party scene, I cried some more, and I definitely laughed some more,  I studied more then than I believe I did in all of my college career. I was excited about life. I was still a young girl, I still had my slim figure as I did in high school, I was very different than I am now. In ways I have become a much mature adult, but in other ways I have developed more negative characteristics. But I have learned so much! I have learned to recognize things in my life that I never knew how to recognize four years ago. I commend myself for growing so much! I tend to focus only on the things that I dislike about myself, but I have some very good qualities as well. These need to be recognized as well! I am growing this year, I can feel it in my bones.

2013. The year I graduate from college. The year I get my first adult job. The year I live for only The Lord and not for men. The year I learn to not love the world. The year I do not victimize myself. The year I realize I am worthy of another man's love. The year I do not fear being hurt. The year I also guard my heart. The year I start treating my body the way it deserves to be treated. The year I to live with my hands open, not holding onto things in my life. The year I love whole-heartedly the people The Lord has called me to pursue. The year I whole-heartedly love myself for who I am and not who I want to become. The year I give to others, rather than wanting more. The year I do not try and be someone "attractive" via social media sites. The year I limit my time on social media, using it for connecting to others NOT comparing to others. The year I grow more into the woman The Lord desires me to be.